inward.

Riveting times. 
Mother Earth is regenerating.
Let’s regenerate with her.
Life as we know it may become permanently altered.
inward–
Go, it’s calling to all inhabitants.
Rest. Detox. Move Slow. Ground yourself.
Let go. Love deeply. Do nothing without intention.
Alkalize your bodies. Laugh often. Practice gratitude.
-inward.

Inward– I wrote that over two weeks ago. Staying home was the recommended thing to do, not yet mandated. Social Distancing wasn’t a widely spread notion. The sun was shining the day I wrote this. I thought, what a profound time to go inward. I had thoughts on how I would maintain my inward position– lots of alkaline foods, water, coconut water, citrus fruits. I had my journal, my laptop, books I planned to finish reading, a text I intend to finish. All of this was before #ClubQuarantine or any of the digital parties I attended–complete with sections and champagne bottles.

I was hopeful at the opportunity for us all to go inward.

I haven’t changed my stance. However, I caution it with hygiene. Why hygiene? It’s been the topic of conversation– “wash your hands” I’ve been, of course, washing my hands and also more conscious of not touching my face. I wipe down my appliances, light fixtures, doorknobs, cell phone more often and more intentionally. More important in that conversation these days is my mental and emotional hygiene. This weekend was tough for me– so much so that I went for a run– I’m clear that when I’m out running, I am dealing with myself vehemently, with fervor and intensity. I do not particularly enjoy running, it never gets more comfortable for me, but it always puts things into perspective. It quiets the noise almost instantaneously. It releases endorphins that have me disappear whatever it was I thought was bothering me. Running allows me to become apparent; that level of clarity is worth the initial discomfort. That’s what I mean by mental hygiene. How are you taking care of your mental health? Especially during a time of forced slow-down.

Today is better for me. It’s only better because I did the things I know to do to ensure that it would be better. I repotted some of my plants yesterday. I watered others and gave them some outdoor time. I gave myself some outdoor time too. I opted out of social media. I went to the farmers market for fresh produce, burned palo santo, journaled, and enjoyed an almost two-hour facetime session with my Howard crew. It was glorious. That’s what I mean by emotional hygiene.

I’m not sure if people are discussing the feelings that they are sorting through. The imaginary symptoms that make them fear they have COVID-19, the anxiety brought on by all the uncertainty– will I be ok? will my family be ok? will I lose someone I love? will I keep my job? how long will this last?– and that’s not even scratching the surface. I have mom’s in their final stretch. Instead of focusing all attention on bringing baby earthside, being celebrated with showers of love and preparing birth bags they are concerned with hospital rules, if their partner, mother, or doula would be able to attend the birth. If they even want to birth in a hospital, if home birth is an option. We all have our set of circumstances that left unchecked will have us up at odd hours, unable to sleep well.

Grace is a remedy I’d say. Give yourself grace no matter what’s coming up. Find productive ways to release. Journaling. Running. Talking to friends. Gardening. Napping. Whatever brings your internal space to your attention, and aids in dissolving what does not serve you at this time. Move slow. Release judgement. Give others grace, too, because we have no idea what’s coming up for them. Trust that like you; they are dealing with all of this the best way they know how to. And in all of that grace, know that you are well equipped to maintain your physical, mental, and emotional hygiene. Listen to your body. Listen to Spirit. You got this. Xx

p.s. This is Mojo Majick Wu-Tang Murphy. He’s my God-kit, and I’ve been learning a lot about grace, rest, and acceptance from having him around.

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